私の假定は果して誤らなかつた。けれども私はたゞ戀の半面丈を想像に描き得たに過ぎなかつた。先生は美くしい戀愛の裏に、恐ろしい悲劇を持つてゐた。さうして其悲劇の何んなに先生に取つて見慘なものであるかは相手の奧さんに丸で知れてゐなかつた。奧さんは今でもそれを知らずにゐる。先生はそれを奧さんに隱して死んだ。先生は奧さんの幸福を破壞する前に、先づ自分の生命を破壞して仕舞つた。
translation
My assumptions were by no means wrong. However, I was only able to picture the half-face of love in my imagination. Sensei had a terrible tragedy behind his beautiful love affair. Thus, the other wife had no idea how much of that tragedy was to Sensei. Okusan is still unaware of this. Sensei hid it from his wife and died. Before destroying his wife's happiness, Sensei first destroyed his own life.
kanji (pronunciations & definitions)
| 私: I (わたし), me, I (あたくし), I (あたし), I (アタシ) | 果: phala (attained state, result) (か), enlightenment (as the fruits of one’s Buddhist practice), fruit, counter for pieces of fruit, end (はたて) | 誤: mistake (ご), error | 戀: (romantic) love (こい) |
| 丈: only (だけ), just, merely, simply, no more than | 想像: imagination (そうぞう), supposition, guess | 得: profit (とく), advantage, benefit, gain, rebirth in paradise, entering nirvana | 過: surplus- (か), excess-, over-, per- (chemical with more of a certain element than found in other compounds of the same constituents) |
| 美: beauty (び), august (み), beautiful | 裏: inside (うち), within, while (e.g. one is young), during, within (e.g. a day) | 恐: frightening (こわ), terrifying, yours sincerely (かしく), yours sincerely (かしこ), respectfully yours | 悲劇: tragedy (ひげき), tragic drama, tragic play, tragedy, calamity |
| 悲劇: tragedy (ひげき), tragic drama, tragic play, tragedy, calamity | 何: what (なに), what (ナニ), you-know-what, you-know-what, that thing | 取: taking (とり), taker, collecting, collector, remover | 相手: companion (あいて), partner, company, other party, addressee |
| 丸: circle (まる), circle (マル), entirety, entirety, whole | 知: wisdom (ち), jnana (higher knowledge) | 今: now (いま), the present time, just now, soon, immediately | 死: death (し), death (ﾀﾋ), decease, decease, (an) out |
| 前: point (さき), tip, end, nozzle, head (of a line) | 先: a short while ago (さっき), a moment ago, just now, some time ago, point (さき) | 自分: myself (じぶん), yourself, oneself, himself, herself | 生命: life (せいめい), existence, (one’s) working life, career, life force |