私はたつた一人山へ行つて、父母の墓の前に跪づきました。半は哀悼の意味、半は感謝の心持で跪いたのです。さうして私の未來の幸福が、此冷たい石の下に横はる彼等の手にまだ握られてでもゐるやうな氣分で、私の運命を守るべく彼等に祈りました。貴方は笑ふかも知れない。私も笑はれても仕方がないと思ひます。然し私はさうした人間だつたのです。
translation
I went to the mountains alone and knelt in front of my parents' graves. He knelt down half in sorrow and half in gratitude. As if my future happiness was still held in their hands lying beneath this cold stone, I prayed to them to protect my destiny. you might laugh I can't help but laugh at myself. But I was that kind of person.
kanji (pronunciations & definitions)
| 私: I (わたし), me, I (あたくし), I (あたし), I (アタシ) | 一人: one person (いちにん), one person (ひとり), being alone, being alone, being by oneself | 山: mountain (やま), hill, mine (e.g. coal mine), heap, pile | 人山: crowd of people (ひとやま) |
| 父母: father and mother (かぞいろ), father and mother (かぞいろは), father and mother (ちちはは), father and mother (ててはは), father and mother (ふぼ) | 墓: grave (はか), gravesite, tomb | 前: point (さき), tip, end, nozzle, head (of a line) | 半: half (はん), semi-, half-past, odd number, han (unit of land area, approx. 595.8 m^2) |
| 意味: meaning (いみ), significance, sense | 半: half (はん), semi-, half-past, odd number, han (unit of land area, approx. 595.8 m^2) | 感謝: thanks (かんしゃ), gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness | 心持: feeling (こころもち), mood, sensation, disposition, mental attitude |
| 石: stone (いし), jewel, precious stone, flint (in a lighter), stone | 下: below (した), down, under, younger (e.g. daughter), bottom | 横: horizontal (as opposed to vertical) (よこ), horizontal (as opposed to vertical) (ヨコ), lying down, lying down, side-to-side (as opposed to front-to-back) | 彼等: they (かれら), them, those (あれら), they, they (of people) |
| 運命: fate (うんめい), destiny, lot | 守: babysitting (もり), babysitter, protecting, keeping, keeper | 貴方: your home (きほう), your residence, you (referring to one’s equal; epistolary style), you (あなた), dear | 笑: laugh (わらい), laughter, smile, sneer, sex aids (e.g. dildos, pornographic books, erotic woodblock prints, etc.) |
| 仕方: way (しかた), method, means, resource, course | 然: -like (ぜん), so (さ), like that, in that way, like that (しか) | 人間: human being (にんげん), human, person, man, mankind |