然し此自分を育て上たと同じ樣な匂の中で、私は又突然結婚問題を伯父から鼻の先へ突き付けられました。伯父の云ふ所は、去年の勸誘を再び繰り返したのみです。理由も去年と同じでした。たゞ此前勸められた時には、何等の目的物がなかつたのに、今度はちやんと肝心の當人を捕まへてゐたので、私は猶困らせられたのです。其當人といふのは伯父の娘即ち私の從妹に當る女でした。その女を貰つて呉れゝば、御互のために便宜である、父も存生中そんな事を話してゐた、と伯父が云ふのです。私もさうすれば便宜だとは思ひました。父が伯父にさういふ風な話をしたといふのも有り得べき事と考へました。然しそれは私が伯父に云はれて、始めて氣が付いたので、云はれない前から、覺つてゐた事柄ではないのです。だから私は驚ろきました。驚ろいたけれども、伯父の希望に無理のない所も、それがために能く解りました。私は迂闊なのでせうか。或はさうなのかも知れませんが、恐らく其從妹に無頓着であつたのが、重な源因になつてゐるのでせう。私は小供のうちから市にゐる伯父の家へ始終遊びに行きました。たゞ行く許でなく、能く其所に泊りました。さうして此從妹とは其時分から親しかつたのです。あなたも御承知でせう、兄妹の間に戀の成立した例のないのを。私は此公認された事實を勝手に布衍してゐるのかも知れないが、始終接觸して親しくなり過ぎた男女の間には、戀に必要な刺戟の起る清新な感じが失なはれてしまふやうに考へてゐます。香をかぎ得るのは、香を焚き出した瞬間に限る如く、酒を味はうのは、酒を飲み始めた刹那にある如く、戀の衝動にも斯ういふ際どい一點が、時間の上に存在してゐるとしか思はれないのです。一度平氣で其所を通り拔けたら、馴れゝば馴れる程、親しみが増す丈で、戀の神經はだん／＼麻痺して來る丈です。私は何う考へ直しても、此從妹を妻にする氣にはなれませんでした。
translation
However, in the same atmosphere that raised me, I was suddenly confronted with the issue of marriage by my uncle. My uncle said that he was only repeating last year's invitation. The reason was the same as last year. When I was summoned the last time, I had no target, but this time I had caught the most important person, so I was put to rest. That person was my uncle's daughter, that is, the woman who was my servant. My uncle said that it would be expedient for both of us to have the woman, and that my father had talked about that during his lifetime. I also thought it would be convenient to do so. I thought it plausible that my father had said something like that to my uncle. But it was only when my uncle told me about it that I realized it, so it wasn't something I had remembered before he said it. So I was amazed. I was surprised, but I could understand why my uncle's wishes were reasonable. Is it because I'm careless? Or maybe that's how it is, but perhaps the fact that I didn't care about my younger sister was a major cause. Ever since I was a child, I have always visited my uncle's house in the city. I didn't just have permission to go, but I stayed there as long as I could. And so, I was on good terms with this younger sister from that time. You know, too, that there is no precedent for love between brothers and sisters. I may be arbitrarily propagating this officially recognized fact, but between a man and a woman who have been in close contact all the time and have grown too close, the fresh feeling of stimulus necessary for love is lost. I'm thinking about it as if I'm going to lose it. Just as the incense can only be smelled the moment the incense is burned out, and the taste of sake can only be experienced the moment one begins to drink it, so in the impulse of love there is such a racy point as time passes. I can only think that it exists in Once you pass through that place without hesitation, the more you get used to it, the more familiar it becomes, and the more you become numb in love. No matter how I thought about it, I couldn't bring myself to take this younger sister as my wife.
kanji (pronunciations & definitions)
| 然: -like (ぜん), so (さ), like that, in that way, like that (しか) | 自分: myself (じぶん), yourself, oneself, himself, herself | 上: above (うえ), over, up, top, summit | 同: the same (どう), the said, likewise |
| 中: inside (なか), interior, among, within, middle | 私: I (わたし), me, I (あたくし), I (あたし), I (アタシ) | 問題: question (e.g. on a test) (もんだい), problem, problem (e.g. societal, political), question, issue | 伯父: uncle (おじ), uncle (しゅくふ), uncle (はくふ), uncle (one’s father’s older brother) (えおじ) |
| 先: a short while ago (さっき), a moment ago, just now, some time ago, point (さき) | 突: very (とっ), much | 付: furnished with (つき), furnished with (づき), furnished with (ツキ), including, including | 所: place (とこ), place (ところ), spot, spot, scene |
| 再: re- (さい), again, repeated, deutero-, deuto- | 返: number of times (へん), reply, answer | 理由: reason (りゆう), reason (わけ), pretext, pretext, motive | 時: time (とき), hour, moment, occasion, case |
| 目的物: object (もくてきぶつ), objective, aim | 今度: this time (こんど), now, next time, another time, shortly | 肝心: essential (かんじん), important, crucial, vital, main | 女: female (うみな), female (おうな), female (おな), female (おみな), female (おんな) |
| 便宜: convenience (びんぎ), convenience (べんぎ), accommodation, accommodation, advantage | 父: father (あて), father (かそ), father (かぞ), father (しし), father (ちち) | 存生: being alive (ぞんじょう) | 中: inside (なか), interior, among, within, middle |
| 事: thing (こと), thing (こん), matter, matter, incident | 話: talk (はなし), speech, chat, conversation, topic | 風: swing (ふり), shake, wave, swinging, appearance | 有: existence (ゆう), possession, having, limited company, bhava (becoming, existence) (う) |
| 考: thought (こう), report on one’s investigation into …, deceased father | 氣: spirit (き), mind, heart, nature, disposition | 前: point (さき), tip, end, nozzle, head (of a line) | 事柄: matter (ことがら), thing, affair, circumstance |
| 無理: unreasonable (むり), unreasonable (ムリ), unnatural, unnatural, unjustifiable | 能: talent (のう), gift, function, noh (theatre) | 解: solution (of an equation, inequality, etc.) (かい), root (e.g. of a polynomial), solution (to a given problem), answer, explanation | 迂闊: careless (うかつ), thoughtless, stupid, heedless, unobservant |
| 知: wisdom (ち), jnana (higher knowledge) | 恐: frightening (こわ), terrifying, yours sincerely (かしく), yours sincerely (かしこ), respectfully yours | 無頓着: indifferent (むとんじゃく), indifferent (むとんちゃく), unconcerned, unconcerned, nonchalant | 重: chief (おも), main, principal, important, main secondary or supporting role (in kyogen) |
| 市: market (いち), fair, city (し) | 家: house (いえ), residence, dwelling, family, household | 始終: continuously (しじゅう), from beginning to end, from first to last | 行: line (of text) (ぎょう), row, verse, carya (austerities), samskara (formations) |
| 其所: there (place relatively near listener) (そこ), there (place just mentioned), that place, then (of some incident just spoken of), that (of point just raised) | 泊: counter for nights of a stay (はく), overnight stay, lodging | 時分: time (じぶん), hour, season, time of the year | 親: parent (おや), parents, mother and father, dealer, banker |
| 兄妹: older brother and younger sister (きょうだい), older brother and younger sister (けいまい) | 間: space (between) (あいだ), space (between) (あわい), gap, gap, interval | 戀: (romantic) love (こい) | 成立: formation (せいりつ), establishment, materialization, coming into existence, conclusion (e.g. of a deal) |
| 公認: official recognition (こうにん), official approval, certification, authorization, authorisation | 勝手: one’s own convenience (かって), one’s way, selfishness, surroundings, environment | 布衍: expatiation (ふえん), enlargement (e.g. on a point), elaboration, amplification, clear explanation | 始終: continuously (しじゅう), from beginning to end, from first to last |
| 男女: men and women (だんじょ), men and women (なんにょ), man and woman, man and woman, both sexes | 必要: necessary (ひつよう), needed, essential, indispensable, necessity | 刺戟: stimulus (しげき), stimulation, irritation (esp. of the body, e.g. skin, eyes), impetus, impulse | 起: source (おこり), origin, cause, beginning, genesis |
| 感: feeling (かん), sensation, emotion, admiration, impression | 失: loss (of something) (しつ), disadvantage, mistake, error, failure | 香: aroma (かおり), fragrance, scent, smell, lance (きょう) | 出: coming out (で), going out, outflow, efflux, rising (of the Sun or the Moon) |
| 限: end (きり), finish, place to stop, bound, limit | 如: tathata (the ultimate nature of all things) (にょ), like (こと), like (ごと), like (もころ), similar to | 酒: alcohol (き), alcohol (くし), alcohol (さけ), alcohol (ささ), alcohol (しゅ) | 味: flavor (あじ), flavour, taste, charm, appeal |
| 刹那: moment (せつな), instant, kshana, duration of a single mental event (about 1/75 second), shortest possible interval of time | 衝動: impulse (しょうどう), urge, impetus | 際: edge (きわ), edge (ぎわ), brink, brink, verge | 時間: time (じかん), hour, period, class, lesson |
| 一度: once (いちど), once (ひとたび), one time, one time, on one occasion | 通: authority (つう), expert, connoisseur, well-informed person, counter for messages, letters, notes, documents, etc. | 増: increase (ぞう) | 丈: only (だけ), just, merely, simply, no more than |
| 何: what (なに), what (ナニ), you-know-what, you-know-what, that thing | 直: straight (なお), ordinary, common, doing nothing, earnestly (ひた) | 妻: wife (つま), garnish (esp. one served with sashimi), trimmings, accompaniment, side (remark) |