同時に私はＫの死因を繰り返し／＼考へたのです。其當座は頭がたゞ戀の一字で支配されてゐた所爲でもありませうが、私の觀察は寧ろ簡單でしかも直線的でした。Ｋは正しく失戀のために死んだものとすぐ極めてしまつたのです。しかし段々落ち付いた氣分で、同じ現象に向つて見ると、さう容易くは解決が着かないやうに思はれて來ました。現實と理想の衝突、――それでもまだ不充分でした。私は仕舞にＫが私のやうにたつた一人で淋しくつて仕方がなくなつた結果、急に所決したのではなからうかと疑がひ出しました。さうして又慄としたのです。私もＫの歩いた路を、Ｋと同じやうに辿つてゐるのだといふ豫覺が、折々風のやうに私の胸を横過り始めたからです。
translation
At the same time, I repeatedly considered the cause of K's death. At that time, it may not have been because my mind was dominated by the word love, but my observations were rather simple and straight forward. It was immediately concluded that K had died of true heartbreak. However, as I gradually calmed down and faced the same phenomenon, I began to feel that the solution would not be so easy. A clash of reality and ideal—and that was still not enough. At the end of the day, I began to wonder if K had suddenly been convicted because he was so lonely that he had to leave alone like I did. I shuddered again. The illusion that I, too, was following the path that K had walked, began to pass through my heart like the wind from time to time.
kanji (pronunciations & definitions)
| 同時: simultaneous (どうじ), concurrent, same time, synchronous, together | 私: I (わたし), me, I (あたくし), I (あたし), I (アタシ) | Ｋ: K (ケイ), K (ケー), k, k, kilo- | 死因: cause of death (しいん) |
| 頭: counter for large animals (e.g. head of cattle) (とう), counter for insects in a collection, counter for helmets, masks, etc., head (あたま), head (かしら) | 戀: (romantic) love (こい) | 一字: (one) letter (いちじ), (one) character | 支配: rule (しはい), domination, control, direction, management |
| 直線的: linear (ちょくせんてき), rectilinear, straight-line, straightforward, simple | 正: (logical) true (せい), regular, 10^40, ten thousand undecillion, original | 死: death (し), death (ﾀﾋ), decease, decease, (an) out | 極: quite (ごく), very, 10^48, quindecillion, pole (きょく) |
| 落: slip (おち), slip (オチ), omission, omission, upshot | 付: furnished with (つき), furnished with (づき), furnished with (ツキ), including, including | 同: the same (どう), the said, likewise | 現象: phenomenon (げんしょう) |
| 容易: easy (ようい), simple, plain | 解決: settlement (かいけつ), solution, resolution | 着: arrival (ちゃく), arriving at …, counter for items or suits of clothing, nth place (in a race), counter for moves | 理想: ideal (りそう), ideals |
| 不充分: insufficient (ふじゅうぶん), inadequate, imperfect | 仕舞: end (しまい), close, finish, termination, noh dance in plain clothes | 一人: one person (いちにん), one person (ひとり), being alone, being alone, being by oneself | 仕方: way (しかた), method, means, resource, course |
| 急: sudden (きゅう), abrupt, unexpected, urgent, pressing | 疑: doubt (ぎ), distrust, suspicion (of) | 出: coming out (で), going out, outflow, efflux, rising (of the Sun or the Moon) | 歩: pawn (ふ), step (ほ), stride, counter for steps, walking (あゆみ) |
| 折々: occasionally (おりおり), now and then, from time to time | 風: swing (ふり), shake, wave, swinging, appearance | 胸: chest (むな), chest (むね), breast, breast, breasts |